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Sunday, 27 November 2011


I love the above lines from a song from the movie "Rock Star." I loved the movie-i thought it was brilliant and Ranbir Kapoor even more so.I am amazed at his acting skills,his sincerity to the role that he's portraying,his realism and the very mature,balanced head that he carries on those shoulders. But i guess it was expected-look at his pedigree-son of my favourite actors of all times-Neetu Singh and Rishi Kapoor. Both of them so naturally effortless and brilliant and sadly who never really got their full due as the most popular mainstream actors. But that's life!! Sometimes the most brilliant stones are left unpolished, just as rocks, because nobody has the foresight to recognise their true potential!!

Any way getting back to the lines from the said song. I will repeat them again-jo bhi main,kehna chahoon,barbaad karein alfaaz mere!!!! Wow!! Can it get more deeper,truer and more profound then that? I dont think it can and on so many levels it rings a bell!I have done it-not once-but hundreds of times and with people that i love and feel a great affinity to! Sometimes you just want to say something or express something so bloody simple -like saying a simple "i love you" to someone who's precious to you ,which incidentally is what Ranbir Kapoor's character in the afore-mentioned movie really wanted to say to Nargis Fakhri's character-but instead it got complicated due to societal norms, hypocritical standards of morality,confusion at the sudden onrush of feelings,false pride,ego,guilt and the non-realisation of what's really important and dear and true!!

To illustrate my point further i will explain two scenarios to you-hopefully you get the gist.Firstly,I am sick of this hypocritical society which openly condones and accepts a man going to a prostitute to satisfy his physical needs and desires!! I mean look around you!! Wake up and smell the coffee!!What are these Bangkok and Pattaya jaunts all about?I am certainly not generalising and putting everyone under the same umbrella, or  saying that every ones treading that path only but believe me those are the rare exceptions!! Ninety five percent men when they make a beeline to the above mentioned places with other men are going there for one and one purpose only-to get laid!!That's it!! We may keep trying to sugar-coat it and we may keep trying to be fool ourselves that no yaar! my hubby's going to play golf or he's going for a business trip or he suddenly loves Thai food but  puhlease!! Get real!!

 By the way let me give you a startling piece of information-it does not happen just with the men now-a- days!! Those are stories of yore!! Increasingly more and more women are treading down that path too!!The Sati-Savitri days are over! Women seek physical gratification too and quite unabashedly and why not?? But the difference being that most women will not actively seek it if they are being looked after and appreciated at home because women are basically more emotional creatures plus they are the receptors and they have to bear the rather unpleasant consequences if actually something goes wrong!! But with most men and please note that i use the word most and not all, physical gratification by any and every means seems their bloody birthright!!! I will sow my wild oats and as far and wide as i can--that seems to be the  male mantra!!I was born to burrow my one eyed snake inside as many tunnels as i can find!! Shocking but true!!

But again who am i to judge!It's a hushed,not talked about but accepted fact!! It has been happening from time immemorial from the days of the Rajas and Nawabs with their harems and multiple begums and daasis and will happen till time immemorial till dooms day arrives and we are all struck by lightning or floods or a meteorite crashing into earth or something as cataclysmic as that!! Anyway to really get to the point-society even if it does so grudgingly-accepts the above, but heaven forbid and hell hath no fury if two people specifically a man or woman who are otherwise attached/legally bound to other people,really do like each other, get along,connect and vibe mentally!! Busji!!Mar gaye!Death by guillotine! Phaansi pe chadhe do !Fireworks, patakas,atom bombs and nuclear bombs!!! And i am talking about platonic relationships mostly.

 Why yaar?? Why such hypocrisy? Only because i am married or attached i can't be friendly or have feelings of affection or caring for somebody of the opposite sex!! Why can't two people just relate to each other as persons and human beings!! What's this mard-aurat chakkar all the bloody time!! There's life beyond sex and physicality!Why can't i just enjoy and revel in somebodys company without getting labelled a challoo- cheez or somebody who has loose morals!! When will we all grow up and become mature as a society and realise that not every relationship is worth labelling or tainting!!! There are some ties of the mind,heart and soul which are undeniable and indefinable and are actually as pure as the driven snow and that there is nothing dirty or lurid or murky about them!!

I have been pondering about it for months now! Why is it that a man/woman can have a one night or two night stand or lets say a brief sexual encounter and get away with it but if there's actual friendship and caring and camaraderie ,we all start getting so jittery and nervous and hysterical specifically like i mentioned before if the parties are otherwise attached!! And i wouldn't be hypocritical and pretend to be Mother Teresa and say that i have never felt those emotions!! I have and have created unpleasant scenes where i have threatened and given ultimatums to my spouse/partner in a similar situation!!

 So that's just it--we sometimes complicate so many things in our heads-we want to say something but we say exactly the opposite because we don't want to take responsibility for our words or deeds! We are always so shit scared that what we say will be misconstrued and misunderstood and that the other person will then take advantage or we may feel guilty that what we say to some other person may hurt our current partner and maybe showing them some form of disrespect or disloyalty!!

Uff tauba!! It's enough to drive an absolutely sane person insane!! In the end i can just say that trust your feelings and emotions which come from the heart because God resides in all of us, in our hearts and souls and he will never put us down a wrong path-if it feels right it is so and if it doesn't then it's not so and quit it immediately!! Sometimes we all have to take a leap of faith and surrender to Him!! He's our Lord and Master and we have to succumb to his will! He writes our kismet and destiny and who are we as mere mortals to question His wisdom?! Go with the flow and leave everything else in his hands and always remember that whatever happens always does so for the best!! That's the one unquestionable and absolute rule!!! So quit worrying and obsessing about every little detail and incident!! Surrender to him and he will show you the path!!! Amen!!!