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Saturday, 14 April 2012

Missing in action!!

Hi folks! How are you?I have been missing in action the last of couple of months as have been tackling a lot of pressing issues on the home front. Firstly, my elder son,a.k.a brat no:1 went off to a weekly boarding school and my God! the whole process was so tumultuous,torturous and completely emotionally wrung me out! I have gone through the whole gamut of emotions in the last three months from happiness to his being accepted in one of the most prestigious schools in the country to sadness that my baby was finally leaving the nest and learning to fly by himself to extreme anxiety because he was being mercilessly bullied in the school hostel to anger at my inability and helplessness to help him out!!

So i have laughed,cried,lay awake numerous nights,pleaded,cajoled-the works!!! I am now a walking,talking encyclopedia on human emotions and human frailties and honestly now feel far older than the modest number of years that i have lived on mother Earth!!! Fine, i agree, that's an exaggeration!!! The number of years are not that modest but at least I'm still in my thirties-chalo i concede-late thirties but what the hell!!! Modest enough--the number of years that is!!!

Secondly after firstly that is, i have become obsessed with my body image. Just want to look thin,thinner and thinnest!! Which by the way is never happening since i am such a fond eater and that's a gross understatement! My family and friends will vouch for it. I love food-i can dream about it,fantasise about it,plot and plan my next meal for hours,take food centric vacations where i will have six straight meals in a day,watch all the foodie programs on television ranging from Nigella Lawson to Madhur Jaffrey to Gordon Ramsay to God alone knows who!!! Which brings me to my current predicament--how do i get to a waist size 26 when i pig out at least 26 times a month!!!

So then i try to over compensate by working out like a mad woman in the gym with my hair all astray and a wild,crazed look in my eye! I pound away at the treadmill as if no tomorrow and sweat a river on the cross-trainer, i vie with all the ahem! body builders in the gym for time on the strength training machines and i monopolise the lone trainer on the gym floor!!My goal always being to work off the Spaghetti Carbonara i had for lunch or the Chocolate fondant cake i had for tea or the double cheese omelette i had for breakfast!!!

 God! Please grant me some wisdom-or if that's a long shot-some self control at least!! Let me not start drooling or salivating the moment i cross a dessert shop in the mall,let me not buy all the foodie magazines in print,let me not pour over ten different recipes of "Moroccan lamb tagine" in the hope of deciphering it and passing along the exact instructions to my trusty cook Santosh to attempt making it at home!!

I guess its all a work in progress as am i! As are all of us! But as long as we keep on striving to do our best and be the best that we can be-it makes the struggle,the effort worth it! Life is about living,struggling,achieving,succeeding and of course failing! In fact i personally believe that failure is a better and bigger teacher than success because after a point in time we can start taking success for granted but failure rankles us,bothers us,keeps pinching at us and forces us to get up and take notice and sometimes that's what is required to get the job done!!!! Just the act of sitting up and taking notice!!!

So strive on and struggle on my dear friends!!! Ultimately we will all reach our destinations but in the meantime let's make the journey worth while and meaningful!! Adios!!